GRANDPAUSE:

As iron sharpen iron, so one man sharpens another. Prov. 27:17

If you have ever watched an experienced blacksmith perform his trade, you cannot escape the power of iron sharpening iron. From the furnace a red-hot strap of iron is pulled, laid on an iron anvil, and with the skill of a true artisan, the blacksmith uses an iron hammer to pound that iron strap ultimately into a finely crafted blade. When he begins the task, it’s difficult to imagine that something so beautiful could come from that inconsequential scrap.

So it is with human relationships. That is the message of Proverbs 27:17. In the same way that a blacksmith’s iron hammer and anvil collide with the prepared strap of iron to form a sharp, durable blade, so two lives pounded together on the anvil of accountability reach a mutual goal of building godly character and strength that perseveres in faith and hope.

The word for man in this passage refers specifically to males. Men know the impact another man can have in our lives, especially when he is willing hold us accountable and push us beyond what we think ourselves capable. Men, regardless of age, need another brother to hold our feet to the fire and sometimes pound on us in a way that ultimately shapes and sharpens us into the person God wants us to be.

This is not to say that this passage does not apply to women, but it is especially true of men. The wisdom literature of Ecclesiastes uses a different metaphor to express the same thing for all persons—male or female. “Two are better than one,” it says in Ecclesiastes 4, ‘because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the one who falls and has no one to help him up.” Both men and women know the importance of working alongside another, not only to produce better work but to help one another up when we fall.

So what does all of this mean for us as grandparents? Here are two possible applications:

1. Your grandchildren need you to be engaged in their lives for more than just a good time. They need you to walk alongside them when life is hard, when the questions are uncomfortable, when doubts arise… to help them process what meaning and purpose and character are all about. They need you to speak into their lives with integrity and authenticity, and to let them speak into yours as well.
2. No matter who you are or what your age, you never outgrow the need for others to speak into your life. It’s easy to grow dull and irrelevant with age. But when you place yourself in the position of journeying in life with others, especially those younger than you, it’s amazing how sharp and attentive you become to God’s voice. Don’t view your mentoring relationship with your grandchildren or anyone else only as a way for you to impart your ‘wisdom’ into them, but also as a way of staying sharp yourself. And don’t forget your adult children in this process.

If you are in a mentoring relationship, you know it is most powerful when it is mutual. Somehow, I always feel that I am the one who gets the most out of it. When I sit down with a passionate thirty year-old Christ follower, I always come away blessed and greatly enriched. And sometimes my grandchildren have more to teach me than I them, if I am willing to listen.

Whether you’re a grandparent or great-grandparent, don’t assume you can do it alone. You need others, both peers and those from other generations. The point is to do it. Your grandchildren need you most of all. Make the most of whatever opportunities you have to be God’s conduit of grace and truth. Make sure to keep your ears, eyes and heart open—and be ready to be blessed by the amazing things they will teach you too!

What are ways you are involved in mentoring your grandchildren and others outside your own generation in the deeper, more heart-oriented matters?