The late Bob Benson, author, itinerate preacher and co-founder of Benson Records, wrote about the house he and his wife built to raise their family. He describes how, in the autumn years of life when the children were grown and gone, they would often reminisce about wonderful memories crowded into every corner, room and nook of their home. Benson reflected on those frequent quiet moments in this sacred place with this comment: “Peg and I will sit quietly by the fire and listen to the laughter in the walls.”¹

What sounds resonate in the walls of your home?

Laughter is a powerful memory trigger that can bring a smile to the face and the heart…if it’s not at someone else’s expense. When laughter springs from a heart that is at peace and rooted in hope, that is a home whose walls will ooze with memories worth savoring for generations to come.

I have discovered that there are generally two types of people when it comes to laughter—if only and in spite of people. I suspect that if only people rarely laugh…or smile. Unless, of course, finances are good, people treat them with respect, or they get that promotion for which they worked so hard.

In spite of people, on the other hand, laugh intentionally and spontaneously. They are delightfully contagious. Even when weeping is inevitable, they still find a way to smile through the tears.

We have a choice of which we want to be, and which of these two memory-builders will fill our walls. If you want to cultivate an in spite of attitude in life, here are a few tips to help you:

1. Ponder the good things. The Bible says, “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable…think about such things” (Philippians 3:8). This is some wise counsel worth paying attention to.
2. Believe God is sovereign and trustworthy. Here are some key Scriptures to consider and meditate on to strengthen your faith: Romans 8:28; John 16:33; Psalm 42:11; 2 Corinthians 4:7-9.
3. Acknowledge pain and hurt, but embrace grace. It’s important to grieve and express your hurt, and to be sensitive to others who are also hurting. It’s also important to believe that our pain has purpose and that joy comes in the morning. (See #2—I’m serious…go back and read the passages listed)
4. Cultivate intentional memory-building moments. Fill your home with hearty laughter, adventurous fun, authentic joy and expressive love—a place where your grandchildren and their families always feel welcome and are reluctant to leave. Displace any museum-like environment where everything is ‘hands-off’ with one where hugs, relationships, and creative adventures are valued above earthly treasures.

This world has more than enough pain and weeping. Your home ought to be a place where your grandchildren find peace and a sense of joyful expectation because both the already and not yet realities of hope reside there. The already reality of Christ’s lavish love and grace revive the soul when sorrows come and make it possible to laugh again.

The not yet part of hope allows everyone to rest in the certainty that one day every tear will be wiped away. The not yet is a reminder that every tear will forever be exchanged for a symphony of hilarious laughter and delight at the banquet table of Christ.

Until then, determine to fill your walls with laughter—the kind that outlives all the other stuff of life. If you do, one day, as you sit alone in those memory-filled places, you will discover that you are not really alone. The sounds of laughter in the walls will lift your heart. And when your children and grandchildren visit that hallowed place, they too will hear the laughter—and smile.

GRANDPAUSE: “You don’t stop laughing because you grow old; you grow old because you stop laughing.” –Michael Pritchard

¹ Laughter in the Walls, Bob Benson, Gaither Family Resources, 1996

Share your experiences. What are ways that you build laughter and joy into the walls of your home?