Grandparents are irreplaceable. The Bible tells us it is both a privilege and a responsibility to see our children’s children (Psalm 71:18; Psalm 128:5-6). A special joy can come with being part of the life of the next generation’s offspring. But difficult challenges, stressful circumstances, and plain hard-to-answer questions frequently accompany the grandparent role. So often we only hear or read about the “fun times” from friends, magazine articles, or online blogs. We may end up confused about how to handle our roles; we think that we are doing something wrong. 

Frequent questions

Our complicated 21st century presents complex issues that previous generations of grandparents didn’t have to face. Just considering the broad array of available communication can be confusing to maneuver (i.e., email, text, face-to-face computer apps, snail mail, cell phones, chatrooms, and more). Our children and grandchildren live in a world where questions about gender, marriage, divorce, child custody, drugs, abortion, euthanasia, religion, personal rights, and a plethora of other difficult issues permeate their daily lives.  We may be asking, “Where is God in all this? How should a godly grandparent respond to these things?” Or, as the popular saying goes, “What would Jesus do – or say?”

Find answers

Where can a grandparent go for words of encouragement and hope or to hear from other grandparents who have traveled a similar path? Larry Hoekman and Bev Phillips are gathering contributions on the challenges many Christian grandparents have faced in real-life situations in an effort to create a resource providing help and support for those in this season of life. We invite readers to submit questions about the challenges you are facing or have faced and, if possible, solutions or efforts you have made to handle an issue. We welcome your questions even if the issue has not been resolved or alleviated. Others may have suggestions or encouragement to share related to your specific situation. 

Replies and questions may be emailed to: 

Bev (bphillips@christiangrandparenting.com) or to Larry (hoek4@charter.net). We will only use your first name or initials on selected submissions. No personal identification will be used if you inform us that you prefer total anonymity.

Bonus questions

Every grandparent has been asked questions by their grandchildren, some humorous, some serious. For extra fun, we welcome any questions your grandchildren have asked you along with how you answered. Grandkids have been known to ask, “Will my dog go to heaven?”, “What was the naughtiest thing my dad/mom ever did when they were a little kid?”, “Who created God?”, “What happens when we die?”, or, from an older child, “How can I tell my friend about Jesus without being preachy or making them mad at me?” We won’t use names, but please include their ages when you describe the interactions.

It’s essential to learn from and support one another as grandparents who desire to leave a godly legacy as we seek to faithfully represent our Savior, Jesus Christ, in extended family relationships. Proverbs 11:14 tells us, “Where there is no guidance, the people fall, but in abundance of counselors there is victory” [NASB]. We thank you in advance for helping us to create a resource that we are trusting God to use as an encouragement to the grandparent generation.

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Bev Phillips, a former church Care Ministries Director, is on the writing team for Christian Grandparenting Network and has an M.A. in Human Services, Marriage, & Family from Liberty University. She and her husband Olin have 14 grandchildren and are certified presenters of “Courageous Grandparenting” conferences through ElderQuest.

Larry Hoekman, author of Intentional Grandparenting with God’s Vision, presents “Intentional Grandparenting” seminars, and is Board Chairman for Fellowship of Christian Athletes. He is a retired teacher and coach. He and his wife Linda have five grandchildren.