A Guide to Great Grandparenting


A Guide to Great Grandparenting by Paul and Diana Miller

This guide provides practical help for building a multigenerational family characterized by love, respect, communication, and mutual support. The key is creating a strong Family Trinity consisting of grandparents, parents and grandchildren, bound together by God’s love. When this God-Given Family Trinity is God-Driven, its benefits endure for generations.



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What Others Have Said

“Very few sources lay out the multi-generational responsibilities in a family structure, and even fewer that do it from a Christian perspective. Paul and Diana Miller have not only defined those responsibilities in this book, they have lived them out in their family. Grandparents will read this book and say, ‘I wish I had known this when I was younger,’ because it is just full of great stuff. It moves from a great visual structure for proper family relationships to wonderful, wise, practical advice for functioning well as a multi-generational family. I’m not aware of another book like this one; I promise you that following its principles will do wonders for your family’s relationships!”

Chief Executive Officer,
The Legacy Coalition

“A second path to becoming great grandparents is by carrying out our grandparent role in such a way that brings the best out of our children and grandchildren. Paul and Diana Miller have turned this concept into a doable strategy, which is why we’re glad you picked up this book. When you’re done reading it, you’re going to be glad you did too … and your extended family is going to be much better off because you did.”

Co-authors of Extreme Grandparenting: the Ride of Your Life

For many years we have witnessed the way Paul and Diana Miller have modeled heroic self-sacrifice in parenthood. Now they do the same as grandparents and share insights for all of us called to the God-ordained honor of being someone’s Grandpa or Grandma. Read and glean!”

KURT BRUNER, author of It Starts At Home
OLIVIA BRUNER, author of The Minivan Years

“If you think grandparenting is just about the grandkids, think again. Paul and Diana’s carefully crafted concept of the Family Trinity birthed from their experiences as parents and grandparents will bring many “ah-ha” moments for grandparents. If you’re serious about being a truly “great” Christian grandparent—one whose legacy will outlive you generation after generation—you must read this book… and share it with your adult children.”

Author of Courageous Grandparenting
Founder and Executive Director, Christian Grandparenting Network

“Paul and Diana add a fresh and practical perspective for grandparenting. Their guidance has been timely for helping us learn to coach our adult children and understand more about our role in this journey of raising the next generation.”


“By clearly defining the role of grandparent coach, Paul and Diana have helped me stop trying to be a “father-corrector” and given me deeper enjoyment in relating to my adult children and grandchildren. I am now learning better ways to observe character, listen, give value, and pray unceasingly in the midst of the fun and confusion. The Millers’ fresh-air insights have blown away pressure generated by the myth that I had to ensure my grandchildren grew up the “right” way. Now I know that what I need to do most is bless my family, often by just being there cheering from the sidelines.”

Grandfather and Family Physician

Who Should Read This Book?

Expectant grandparents-to-be

People who are about to become new grandparents can learn from this book about the great changes that are coming to their lives and pre- pare them for new relationships, roles, and responsibilities. What lies ahead is not exactly what most people expect or are led to believe. In fact, grandparenting is as much about your relationship with your adult children as it is about your grandchildren. Those who focus only on the grandkids will miss out on the joy of helping and being with their adult children.

Grandparents who want to get better

We think grandparenting is best done in the context of the “God-Giv- en and God Driven Family Trinity” that consists of three generations (grandparents, parents, and grandchildren) and the unique relation- ships that exist among them. This book shows that grandparents can help most by coaching their adult children, which means replacing their old parent-child relationship with a new and improved version. Specifically, the adult children’s newly-experienced ability to love their child unconditionally triggers new-found respect and love for the grand- parents that can change everything for the better!

Grandparents who aren’t sure what to do

This book also guides grandparents who are uncertain about their roles and responsibilities. How much should they be involved? When should they stand back and watch? What’s the difference between help- ing and interfering? What should they do about babysitting, spoiling, and gift-giving? The answers are different from what many think and what a lot of books say. We think this guidance will liberate and em- power grandparents to build better relationships in their Family Trinity.

Grandparents in special situations

Have you become a grandparent by adoption? Have your adult chil- dren decided to get involved in foster care? Does your growing family include new members who come from different cultures? This book will help you learn what these situations involve and get insight into how you can contribute as only grandparents can!

Grandparents in difficult situations

Has your family felt the pain and difficulties that come from such things as death, divorce, disability, detachment, and deployment? These situ- ations surely call on grandparents to step up to new roles and respon- sibilities. This book explains how to do your part to help sustain the family’s stability and courageously get through these struggles.